Jersey Shore JWoww In A Bikini

Finally, here’s JWoww in a bikini to cleanse your palate of Snarf-ass and bring Bikini Morning to its inevitable, fake-breasted close. I don’t really have much to say here about JWoww but I’m sure she has a wonderful personality that no one will ever make eye contact with ultimately resulting in a lonely middle-aged existence giving BJs with her trach hole.

*opens eyes*

What the? Blacked out there for a second which means I accurately predicted the future again, didn’t I? Dammit! Tell me it at least involves me banging a Martian, I don’t want to look back and find out I die making toast.